Life, Religion, philosophy and sarcasm – part two

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#Biased??
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Son: “Why did God favor the Israelites so much in the Old Testament?”
Dad: ” I don’t know son. They were the chosen people?”
Son: “That makes him a biased God, isn’t it?”
Dad: “May be.”
Son: “And he did all these knowing that the Jews won’t accept his son as Messiah…”
Son: “What does that make him dad?”
Dad: “Honey!!!! Did you enroll our son to the Sunday School or some philosophy class?”

Original: http;//nokik.blogspot.com
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#Proving a Point

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Son: “Dad, why did God caused so many killing to prove his point?”
Dad: “Because he had to, from time to time….without which they’d stop believing in him”
Son: “Mahatma Gandhi could have done better with non-violence dad”

Original: http;//nokik.blogspot.com
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#Chastity
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Son: “Dad, I am 14 years old and you said I am sexually capable now and that I should be careful about that”.
Dad: “Yes, you should be very careful.”
Son: “But dad, why would God make me sexually capable at 14 and not want me to have sex till marriage?”
Dad: (Stunned) “….err.r….He wants you to practice self-control”.

Original: http;//nokik.blogspot.com
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#Test of faith?
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Son: “Why did God ask Abraham to sacrifice his son?”
Dad: “Son, God wanted to test his faith, if he would still obey him.”
Son: ‘Geeezzz….was He so desperate to know?”

Original: http;//nokik.blogspot.com
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#Not by deeds but by grace alone
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If it’s not by deeds but by grace alone that we are saved, why do we bother so much about what we do, and then judge others based on it.

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#Life is relative
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I am sitting here in a cafe beside a busy road and I have pretty nothing much to do. A bit bored after all the chores too. And looking at the rush on the road I am wondering –
“Where are all these people going? Why are they so much in a hurry? “


When I get up and move out from here I will soon join the busy crowd.

I wonder if any one would look out and wondering where this crowd (including me)  is going to?

One of the passerby looks at me and think “Oh man! That dude has all the time in the world to just there and gaze at the crowd”

Quite relative huh?
Well, life is and everything in it.

:As jotted on my phone notepad on Friday evening, the 9th of September
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#Euthyphro’s dilemma
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Is something moral because God said so?
No.
God said so because it is. He didn’t say anything special that a person with the knowledge of good and evil won’t know.
But if God would command something immoral to be moral, you’d know God ain’t right.
And if we’d take anything commanded by God as good, we’d be sick.

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[continued]

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Life, Religion, philosophy and sarcasm – part one

Religion, philosophy and sarcasm of a wondering youth…puzzled, confused with the mysteries of life but still having hope – especially that things are they way we belief they are. Some are thought provoking jokes actually….don’t sue me. And in the end, nothing really matters. 🙂

PLEASE NOTE: There are some jokes which are original. Those are marked “ORIGINAL”. There rest aren’t copied but inspired. 🙂

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#Why do each group thinks they have the sole right to inherit heaven?

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A man meets St.Peter at the gates of heaven.

St. Peter asks “Religion?”
The Man replied : ”Catholic” St.Peter: “Ok. Go to hall #22”

2nd man. St. Peter asks “Religion?”
2nd Man:” Baptist”. St.Peter:”Ok. Go to Hall #23”

3rd man. St. Peter asks “Religion?”
3rd Man: “Methodist” St. Peter: “ok, you go to Hall #24”

The man curiously asks St. Peter, “Why separate halls?”
St.Peter replied:” Each group thinks they are the only ones up here”

That man is the only one struggling to live with a secret in heaven.

This is a joke only about Christians (so many denominations with noodle-chaotic doctrines) because St. Peter is in the picture. But there are other religions too, you know that. And they got divisions too. Though, different in ideals each group believes in one thing – they think they are the only ones rightful to be saved, rest others are all damned.

How can all arguing parties be right? Some one screwed up somewhere?
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#Free Will and God’s will dilemma and Omnipotence

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The God’s Will  belief: God has planned your future…your future is decided. He knew you even when he formed you in your mother’s womb. But you still have Free Will.

Seeking God’s Will – Tuning you Free Will to God’s Will is a very confusing task, isn’t it?
How could you be sure?  You only know based on what you belief.

Gentleman: “Who do I know it’s God’s will?”
Priest: “Faith. Pray and God will speak to you”.
Gentleman: “Yeah, right”. But how do I know I’m not shooting in the dark?”
Priest: “Faith” 
Gentleman: “Damn! I should have killed my girlfriend’s lover when the voice was speaking to me”.
[ORIGINAL – http://nokik.blogspot.com

It’s sad some who try juggling with tuning Free-Will to God’s Will, will still die as murderers, rapists, drug addicts….that can’t be God’s plan for him. No way?

Gentleman 2: “Is God really Omnipotent?  He could have save many humans, aye?Does he care?“
Gentleman 3: “I will ask God when I get to heaven.”
Gentleman 2: “Good Bet. Good luck. Tell him he should use his Omnipotence a bit more…tell Him there are a lot dying down here…”
Gentleman 2: “But what if you get to hell? Can Lucifer help?”
Gentleman 3: “Is he Omnipotent too?”
Gentleman 2: “But is there really heaven and hell? “
Gentleman 3: “For that….I will ask my priest.”
Gentleman 2: “Forget it then. I already know the answer.“
Gentleman 3: “What is it?”
Gentleman 2: “Faith“.
[ORIGINAL – http://nokik.blogspot.com



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#Most dangerous force

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Gentleman 1: “What’s the world’s most dangerous force?”
Gentleman 2: “Religion”.
Gentleman 1: “Why?”
Gentleman 2: “Because God is powerful.”
Gentleman 1: “But is God dangerous?”
Gentleman 2: “Depends on how you use it?”


[ORIGINAL – http://nokik.blogspot.com


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#Why so different when they all claim to follow Christ?

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Jews don’t recognize Jesus.
Protestants don’t recognize the Pope.
The baptists don’t recognize each other in the bar.

Source: Plato and a Platypus walk in to a bar –  by Tom Cathcart and Daniel Klein

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# Dont’ circumcise but you should still tithe. Hmmm..where is this written?

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Why are Christian still tithing?
Shouldn’t they be burning offering and getting circumcised as well?
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#Cherry pick and use Bible verses to fit your argument?? That’s no good???

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Why do they say the commands were for Israelite in the Old Testament if you question why Christians eat most of the animals listed in Leviticus, Chapter 11 that should not be eaten?

On the other hand, why are other Old Testament passages taken seriously as Law. Aren’t they meant for those under Mosaic Law? Isn’t the death of Christ on the Cross the start of the New Covenant for Christians. If not, we should circumcise. 🙂
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#What caused this confusion?

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The Old Testament [Jews] prophets prophesied a Messiah.  But when someone came claiming he was the one, they didn’t believe in Him. His followers believed him that he was the one the prophets prophesied.
But the Jews are still waiting.
Who could be right? It’s obvious Christian and Jews both can’t be right?
BTW that was prophesied too!!! That his own people will deny him. What was God trying to prove? Do you know? Anyway, consider this-

• If the Jews are wrong, would God’s chosen people will all perish in Hell?. (sigh) That’ll be sad to think about God’s favorite people (Israelites) in hell and the Gentile rejoicing in Heaven.
• If the Christians are wrong, would the Jews call the Christian “idiots“? “See, we told ya!!” (laughs).

[continued in Religion, philosophy and sarcasm – part two]

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